but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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