wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
