i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
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