talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Randomize