on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
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