he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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