There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
