you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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