It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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