ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
