office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
