ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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