I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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