I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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