I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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