they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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