Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
