Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
