We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
