Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
