1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
