Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
im holly from the hills drunk
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
