Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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