Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize