Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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