my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What drink are we having for lunch?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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