Pregnant stripper...not hot.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
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Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
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Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
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She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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