"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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