I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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