how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize