i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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