He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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