she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Randomize