I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
