I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
