she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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