either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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