so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
