Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Randomize
