We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
