The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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