I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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