Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
