its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize