Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
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