Pants 0. Shit 1.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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