After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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