I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
