Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
