Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Randomize
