Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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