So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
